What I Seek

What I seek in my sub isn’t blind following, or TPE, or agreement in everything. I value intelligence, and application of that intelligence to the relationship. I am not the kind of Dom that gives orders and expects to be obeyed in everything. My domain is the bedroom, and select other areas outside the bedroom. I expect my sub to show me respect and listen to me.

I will differentiate between protocol and non-protocol time.

In protocol, I expect “Sir” to be used regularly, I expect my directions to be followed, and I expect my sub to maintain positions until directed otherwise. During that time, I am using my sub for punishment or pleasure.

Outside of protocol, I expect my sub/wife to be herself. She is wilful, funny, bratty, intelligent, and can hold her own with me. I do, however, still expect to feel the respect, and a well placed “Sir” does wonders. I also need her to kneel when instructed to do so, even outside of protocol time. Bratting too far or pushing buttons too much will earn a punishment, even if it is not protocol time. Now, that is a fine line for her to walk, and I have not clearly defined the limit. I’m not sure I can define it, except by warning her on a case by case basis. Sometimes I know she is pushing me to see how far she can go, or sometimes I can tell she is “asking for it.” Sometimes I have no idea and I just see it as frustrating and it devolves from there. “So what?”, or “It doesn’t mater anyway.” or similar are a one way ticket to a punishment though.

I’m afraid that probably wasn’t very clear or concise. I’m still figuring it out and developing with my sub. I am trying to be more specific with her when we discuss D/s, but it is far from complete.